Okay so I've just finished reading The Wife in The North, a book by Judith Reilly which she based on her blogs over the period of approximately 2 years or so covering her move from London to Northumberland. She was basically just 'venting her spleen' and I thought "I should do that". I have always enjoyed writing and journalling and at the moment I feel as if I have a lot to vent about.
I'm just trying to recover from a nasty case of tonsillitis which in itself is ridiculous. I always thought this was just one of those childhood things which adults don't get but I am 39 and have suffered, yes really suffered, my first experience of tonsillitis. The worst part about it was that it abruptly ended my very happy holiday last week. As I was driving home from a short but so wonderful stay in Leicester with my 1 year old daughter, I started to feel incredibly woozy. I felt very feverish and was unpleasantly sweaty. I hadn't felt great when I woke up in the morning but had put that down to sightseeing in London the previous day and a lot of chatting with my Dearest Friend, so I just took a couple of paracetamol and got on with it.
Eventually I realised that I ought to pull over so I stopped at junction 30 of the M1 and I guess I just passed out. I don't know how long I slept but I awoke and realised that Darling Baby could overheat in the car while I slept so I rolled the windows down a little and carried on with the journey. It took until 3pm to get home and I just about managed to carry Darling Baby into the house and up the stairs and crawled into bed. This was on the Thursday. Husband didn't turn up home until the wee small hours and didn't appear to care that I was ill as he was too tired to think about that.
The next morning I felt worse still and could hardly croak. My throat felt as if I had swallowed two incredibly large golf balls which had got stuck in there. Thankfully Husband arranged to take Darling Baby to the In-Laws and off he went leaving me ill without even so much as a drink. He popped back in the afternoon to check on me but didn't sort out anything for me to eat, not that I had an appetite or possibly even ability to swallow anything but still I felt he ought to have made more of an effort.
Mother-In-Law turned up later in the evening to return Darling Baby safely fed and bathed and ready to pop into her bed. I was so happy to see her but it was probably more a grimace than a smile which I was able to offer her. Mother-In-Law was rather concerned about me and prayed with me before she left. Thankfully she also brought me an ice-cube to suck on. Oh sweet joy it was to suck that ice-cube. It was the only thing I had which soothed my unbearable throat.
The days have all merged so that I don't even know what day it is today but finally I've been able to get some penicillin from the doctor which has started its work.
I guess I ought to forgive Husband for not being better at playing nurse maid. He's not to blame and he was busy doing the sound for an important conference. He's got some more paid work this week too.
It's been so tough since he lost his job (working with computers) in February. Even though he's now starting to pick up a few days of work here and there we're struggling desperately to make ends meet. It makes me so angry because I'm working full-time (admittedly doing a job I enjoy) but having to leave Darling Baby all-day. I always wanted to be a full-time Mummy or at very least just part-time but my dream has had to take a backseat so that Husband can live his dream. He gets to do freelance sound, lighting and rigging and when he's not doing that he gets to play with Darling Baby.
Oh well I should just get on with it - recovering that is - then the world will look brighter.
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